Oracle
27 February 2015 / submitted by Carrie, United States of America
Q.  TEAM ORACLE QUESTION #206

Have you ever wanted to express to someone how much they mean to you and how grateful you are for them but there just aren't words that exist that will properly convey what you feel? What do you do?
TEAM ORACLE QUESTION #206

You show them. I'm wondering if you're meaning that you are overwhelmed by your feelings and struggle to articulate your words or if you genuinely feel so strongly that you think there aren't any words.
This probably won't surprise you but words don't often fail me. In my world, there are always words. Sometimes there are simply a few ("thank you") and sometimes that are many.
I like to write down thoughts and feelings. Maybe a poem right from the heart would do the trick?
There's a saying: actions speak louder than words. There might be a way for you to put your feelings into a gesture.
This person obviously means a lot to you, perhaps you could make something personal for them: a playlist, a memory book, photo book, a gift... something that shows your gratitude.
Over to you.

Ah, yes. Oh so many times. As a person who loves to speak in metaphors when expressing love and appreciation, sometimes I can't think up the right one, or find difficulty in getting my message over properly. Usually, I don't find it to be bothering enough because I find my way around it, but when I don't, I have to stick to actions as of course they speak louder than words. I express my feelings towards them by showing them how much I care instead of telling them. I look out for them, provide them with emotional support, and show them great appreciation when they are feeling low. However, you have to be careful with this, as too much can come off as clingy, or bloat their ego massively. I hope this helps. Love, Solaf.

Action speak louder than words.
Show the one you love how much they mean to you with how you treat them, how much time you spend with them. Give them a kiss, a hug (*Oracle's note: ask permission! O.) Write a song if you are a musician - instrumental if you fail for words for the lyrics. Surprise them with a present if you know what he / she likes very much.
Love from Germany. Maren.

Yes, I have felt this and then some many times. I'm not usually a shy person- I am loud, outspoken, And I'm not afraid to stand up for myself. Sometimes I even speak just to know I'm not being ignored.
That being said, I am very quiet at times when I just don't know what to do, like when I want to express gratitude for someone who means the world to me. I met someone, who changed my life, and now - almost two years later - he has no idea how much I care about him. The most I've ever said is, "Thanks for, well, everything."
As to what to do about this, the answer could not be more clear- just tell them how you feel. This, of course, is a given. Sometimes, I guess, it feels weird just saying, "Thank you for..." whatever, because, well, it just is. More often than not, I trip over my words just to order food, let alone voice my deepest gratitude for someone I really care about! But, like most situations, the waiting is the worst part. You will feel so much better after you've said some kind of thanks. Victoria.


I know also some-one Who means a lot to me, and yes it's really not easy to express in words how much that person means to me, he was in my live when I was 13 years old he was the only person I trust, he was like a father to me, at that moment I was feeling my self alone and had the feeling that it was me against the world, but he shows me that the world was not that dark that it looks like so I guess that sometimes you don't have the words to explain how much some-one means to you, you feel it in you're heart and believe me he / she knows.
Greetzz Marianne.

Once again a lovely question. My mind races but a simple answer will suffice. Sometimes gestures need not be grand or lavish to get our point across. What matters is not what we say but HOW we say it, or the context of saying it. Look deep in your heart and ask how you feel. Try not to edit it, or worry about how corny it may come across. I am reminded of a previous answer I gave on this site, in which my daughter thanked me and her simple words meant far far more. Sometimes it is hard to put our true feelings into words but a heart bursting with gratitude is not easily hidden and our emotions and body language will all convey what we may feel we have left unsaid. I feel this way about Coldplay how do you thank talented artists for bringing passion and joy to your life? I feel unable to convey it but I hope they know this soul has a much richer life because of it. Best wishes to you and take care, Laurie.

I have to admit that your question is a question I put myself many times over the years.
The thing is, if you feel something for someone like, love for a guy or love for a friend or family, you have to say it.
I'll tell you something, 3 years ago, my grandfather died and I haven't got the chance to say to him how much I loved him and that broke my heart. Since that day, I always say to my family how much I love them and I do the same for my friends as well because you never know. It might be the first time you see someone or the last time and you don't have to regret that you didn't say something. I proved myself a year ago that I can speak my heart by telling the guy I loved that I truly love him and even though nothing happened between us, I am so happy that I was able to lift off that weight over my shoulders.
You should do the same. Be Strong and Confident, if you truly love someone with all your heart, tell that person so you won't regret it later like me.
Learn from mistakes and be brave.
Take care of you!!
Lots of Love from Romania!
Madalina.

Maybe you can express how you feel by showing them a song. Carolyn.

I think what you could do is write to that person. I personally love writing because I find it a lot easier to express what I feel clearly, it also actually helps me to clear things out in my mind. What I would suggest you is to write a letter but without thinking too much about what you are doing or saying, just be honest and say what's in your heart. Let the words flow through you - be relaxed and have a calm mind and it will come by itself. And even if you can't really express what you feel properly with words - as those things are really things that you actually have to feel - even saying that will have an impact and has a true meaning. And hopefully the other person will feel the same towards you and will understand what you are talking about. Trust yourself and trust the person you love and his understanding. But if you really feel like you have to tell him/her, do it, really.
With Love, Chloe.

If you don't have words,then use actions. Make some surprise to a person. Buy something that he or she needs or plan some trip to some special place. Do whatever that person would like you to do. But may be the hardest would be to find those words of gratitude, so you should do it if you feel thankful and full of love. That person probably doesn't know the reasons of your gratitude. I mean maybe he/she knows your feelings and love but can't assume that he/she has done for you so much. I think that we never know why we are important to close people. They never say the facts about us and we don't say it to them. Friendships, family relationships and even romantic relationships are taken for granted sometimes in sense that we don't express our love and gratitude by words and facts about persons. Everyone needs to hear why he is special and what qualities he has, no matter how close we are and how understandable that thing is. So find the words and tell or write a letter, every memory of that person, action, quality. I'm sure he/she would be happy to hear that. There's a song in my language which says:"You're better than me, you're better, even when you're worse, you're better. You're better then me, you're better. I'm not ashamed to tell that you're better." We should use these words sometimes. Love, Kamili

When the words do not exist, then perhaps you could try to express yourself in a different way. Whether it is through music, art or even human touch/embrace. I don't know what this person's relationship is to you, but sometimes all it takes is your physical presence. Sometimes, you just need to be there. Don't underestimate the power of something as simple as a genuine loving embrace. Barbara.

Thanks to all those who replied to this week's question. Remember, Team Oracle is open to anyone so if you fancy replying, click to read this week's, and send us your answer.



27 February 2015 / submitted by The Oracle, United Kingdom
Q.  WHO'D LIKE TO JOIN TEAM ORACLE?

As you may know, we have a weekly feature, Team Oracle, whereby each Friday we open questions of a personal nature to all of you to answer too. Then, the following Friday, I post a selection of the best answers, alongside my own reply.

ANYONE can join in so, if you'd like to, please email your response to the following question, in no more than 250 words, to theoracle@coldplay.com before midnight Thursday 5 March.

I'm debating whether to do what I know is right or what makes me happy. I would appreciate your wise advice. Thank You. Pam, USA.

Look forward to reading your replies.

The Oracle.
Please email your replies with TEAM ORACLE in the subject line to theoracle@coldplay.com
Including your twitter address may result in a follow back.



26 February 2015 / submitted by Hans, Germany
Q.  I have a Xyloband from the Mylo Tour. Do you know if it is possible to iluminate it again?
Thank you!
It is possible but it's not really supposed to. There were many reports of Xylobands bursting back into life - mine did once - but to deliberately make it glow would involve tampering with the mechanism. I don't know how to do it personally but I did hear of someone posting online how to. I wouldn't advise it to be honest.


26 February 2015 / submitted by Clementine, France
Q.  Hello, I'm wondering if Coldplay has got any fanmail adress. This is just the best group in the entire world, and I wanna write them a fanmail... Thanks!
We have the contact form on this website where you can send a message but please, only ONE per person. All are read but not necessarily replied to due to the sheer volume.



26 February 2015 / submitted by Kristin, United States of America
Q.  Why was it so weird to sit in the 2nd row? (when you went with your family),

I sat behind the stage once- strange angle, but amazing concert of course!

Kristin
I realise it sounds odd but it sometimes feels a little strange when there is eye contact during a show because of the close proximity. I hope it doesn't put them off!


25 February 2015 / submitted by CPSongOfTheDay via twitter, New Zealand
Q.  Hey Oracle. Do you have any info on a song called Before I Lose which was possibly played in 1998?
Allegedly it was played live once but I wasn't there so didn't hear it. In fact, I have never even heard of it.


25 February 2015 / submitted by Lucas, Brazil
Q.  What's your guess for the Academy Awards this Sunday?
I meant to answer this last week, sorry. I didn't fair well this year, I only predicted 5 correctly: Best Actor, Actress, Supporting Actor, Actress and Best Animated Feature.


25 February 2015 / submitted by Kamili, Croatia
Q.  Dear Oracle,I'm fascinated by the fact that you've been replying to people's problems every Friday for so many years. It motivates me and it's such wonderful thing. It made me wonder if would be possible that each of the band members reply for example once a year,so we'd have 4 answers a year from them? Thanks,bye! :-) Kamili
That's a lovely thing to say; Team Oracle is one of my favourite things.
I'm not likely to write a song on their album anytime soon so I'm afraid they won't be entering into the agony Uncle role. I jest but no, that's not going to happen.
Phil & Anchorman have contributed to a couple of end of year ones before.



24 February 2015 / submitted by Gwenn, France
Q.  Hello, what film inspired Chris to write Every Teardrop is a Waterfall? Thank you. Love Coldplay and members.
Ah, I really need to watch this film again. It was the sublime Biutiful starring Javier Bardem. There was a scene in a seedy bar and Ritmo de la Noche (performed by Lorca) was playing.
I've spoken of this before.




24 February 2015 / submitted by Millie, United Kingdom
Q.  Hey Oracle!
I was just curious whether you know if all the band are attending the Brit Awards this year? I know that they've been nominated, but last time there was only two of them. Also, will you be going too?
Thank you so much.
I will be there but totally unrelated to Coldplay.
The first year the band won, I managed to get a balcony ticket (at Earl's Court) from a friend. I then snuck in to the main room after dinner but in time for the awards presentation. I sat with BMG though.
Tomorrow will only be the second time I have attended, I've never been with the band.
The band aren't able to make it this time.




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